There are two major reactions when we see others succeed. We either draw motivation from it or get envious and frustrated. No matter what is the case, the reaction will influence our future progress. The goal of this article is to discuss the two viewpoints and help the reader to switch to the more beneficial one.
Comparing the two viewpoints
Frustration and envy of other people’s success are symptoms of passive mindset. People with a passive mindset often has trouble improving because the belief that talents come naturally, you either born with it or not. For them learning is hard, they are afraid of a challenge. When they compare themselves to others they may come to the conclusion that they are not good enough. Instead of setting new standards or challenges for themselves they get envious of other people’s success and get frustrated by the lack of their success. For them, experiencing failure often means they are failures themselves.
The negative feelings induced in their head often has social roots as well. Hating the other person, or believing that they don’t deserve the success can multiply the chance of slipping into this negative mindset. Feelings about ourselves like feeling you are underperforming or the lack of self-confidence can easily cause frustrations as well.
On the other hand, people with active mindset draw motivation from others success. This induces hunger for more knowledge and experience, continues improvement and setting new, harder challenges instead of self-pity. Comparing themselves to others will enhance the desire of getting better and that is what drives them towards their goals. They are not free for social prejudice as well, but they can see past that. They know that the goals are more important than a burst of negative feelings, like jealousy, hatred or frustration. They focus on the destination, not on some bumps on the road.
Don’t get me wrong! People with active mindset are often frustrated by failure as well. The difference is that they don’t stop there. I know I often get frustrated when I don’t know why I don’t get the expected results, and the frustration remains until I learn from the experience. I’m not the perfect example for a person with an active mindset, but I know that knowing what went wrong is what that turns a defeat into a victory.
Make these thoughts your own!
Adjusting your mindset is not an easy task, that can happen overnight. I wrote a guide on How to change your mindset and collected a few thoughts, that can help you adjust.
- For every effect, there is a cause. Everything happens for a reason, no exceptions.
- The invested energy and effort always pays off. Be patient!
- There is no progress without improvement. Learn from your mistakes!
- There is no improvement without challenge. Set new challenges for yourself!
- Envy and self-pity are nailing you to the present. Focus on the result you want instead of rivalry!
- The only good way of comparing your success and others is to draw motivation from it.
“You must expect great things of yourself before you can do them.”
– Michael Jordan
I really hope this article helps you adjust your thoughts in a positive way when it comes to seeing other people succeed. This article was inspired by the common attitude in my country. Here, people often drag others down, instead of helping themselves to rise. If that sound familiar, I recommend taking the ideas presented in this article to heart. If you enjoyed this article, please share it with someone, as it will help this site to grow. All support is greatly appreciated. If you wish to discuss this topic or just want to leave a message, you can do that by leaving a comment, or writing me an email.
About the authorGabor Hosszu is the founder and head article writer of Goals Infinite. Being passionate about personal development and helping others were the main reasons he launched this site. By trade Gabor is a mechanical engineer. His hobbies include being a chilli farmer, a video game nerd and a wannabe beer expert.