Accepting your flaws is not enough

rough_slides_v3_3We all have flaws and that is ok. What is not ok is not making an effort to better ourselves or even hide behind them as an excuse. This may seem an unpopular opinion in the age of tolerance and being offended, but this blog is for those who want to better themselves. The goal of this article is to raise an argument to don’t just accept your flaws but work on them and convince the reader to think differently about his or her shortcomings. WARNING, harsh content ahead!

The four stages of knowing your flaws

Knowing and understanding your flaws has different stages from complete ignorance to making an effort to improve. To make this explanation clear I’ll talk about a fictional person called, Jim. Now, let’s see each of the stages in detail.

Stage one: Ignorance

At this point, Jim is completely unaware of one or more of his flaws. The reason behind this can be that this flaw has not surfaced yet. Jim just never experienced a situation where they would show themselves. Let’s call these dormant flaws. These may surface at one point or may stay dormant for the rest of his life. On the other hand, Jim may choose to ignore one or more of his flaws, staying ignorant by decision. This can be a sign of high ego and Jim may end up blaming outside forces for his mistakes.

Stage two: Knowing

At the stage, Jim is aware of one or more of his flaws. He knows that he is not perfect, but the thought can make his unsatisfied with himself, or maybe even mad, angry or furious. People with this kind of mindset are often sore losers, who has a hard time accepting defeat or failure. They can’t take criticism, not even when it is a constructive one. This is often a sign of a passive mindset. People like this often just want to prove themselves instead of making an effort to improve.

Goals Infinite: Accepting your flaws is not enough

Stage three: Knowing and accepting

Jim is aware that he is not perfect, but he made peace with it. He may want to avoid situations where his flaws may surface once again, maybe even fear them. The fear of failure can be one of the most crippling feeling when it comes to stepping out of the comfort zone. See how he can create an obstacle for himself just by accepting his flaws. Even worse when he uses his flaws and weaknesses as an excuse to say and do stuff that is normally not acceptable, especially when you do it in public.

Stage four: Knowing and improving

Being aware and focusing on improving is the ideal state of mind when it comes to deal with your flaws. Jim is aware and knows what to do, so he’ll have a different outcome in a situation where previously his flaws surfaced. In the article How to change your mindset we offer simple tricks that you can use to improve your flaws as well. The key is awareness.

The age of tolerance

We live in an age where we accept and tolerate everything, that is not against the law. Where everyone is special and mediocrity is celebrated. But is this good or not? In my opinion, it is a grey area, but when it comes to personal development and self-help I see more negative effects than positive. Teaching a kid to accept his flaws and not teaching him to make an effort to improve is something that will push his mindset towards a passive one.

Accepting the flaws you have is just the first step. If you can become a better person by focusing and improving upon your shortcomings, you must. There will be things that you may not have control over, but if you are in control, improvement is the way to go. There is no good reason to sit inside your comfort zone and stay a mediocre achiever. Think about flaws like this: flaws are nothing more, than signs that show you where to improve yourself.

If you found this article valuable or useful, I’d like to ask you to share it with someone. It costs nothing and it will help our site to grow. If you have any thoughts or would like to start a conversation you can do that by leaving a comment or writing me an email.


Sign up for our newsletter and get free eBooks!


About the author

Gabor Hosszu is the founder and head article writer of Goals Infinite. Being passionate about personal development and helping others were the main reasons he launched this site. By trade Gabor is a mechanical engineer. His hobbies include being a chilli farmer, a video game nerd and a wannabe beer expert.